Beer Olympics! YES YES YES!
Yeeeeeeeeeeeehaaaaaw. Alright you motherfuckers and motherfuckettes, it's time for the goddamn 2005 Beer Olympics! The weak, the handicapped, the easily offended, do yourselves a favor and stay the fuck at home. We want your base, your wicked: the strippers, the prostitutes, nihilists, pagans, the conservatives alike. Sloth, gluttony, ass-slapping, beer-chugging, excessive urination; no Sin will go unrecognized, no soul will leave untarnished. What monumentous event could bring this dark army together you ask? Where could such a mass gather without bringing forth the hand of God to smite them? What reason could there possibly be for this for orgy of Sin and debauchery? The First Annual 2005 Beer Olympics, that's what.
Ok, so it may end up not being exactly as advertised above. But it should be a fuckin' good row. The plan is in it's infantile stages at the moment. I've come up with 4 solid events. And am working relentlessly on the rest. Flyers, food, maybe t-shirts and a trophy, it'll be sweet. And if nobody shows up, well Pat and I will just get wasted and fight. It's a win win.
I wouldn't mind some help coming up with ideas. Here are the events thus far:
1. 40oz Dash (Race to drink 400z bottle of beer the fastest. Regular beer, not malt liquor)
2. Keg Toss (Empty keg, toss as far as you can, disqualified if you step over line. Done this one before, surprisingly awkward.)
3. Keg Stand (self-explanatory, longest keg stand wins)
4. Beirut (More skill in this event than drinking. Not sure if I want to do doubles or not. I'll have to type up a quick summary of the game for participants and spectators alike)
Those are the events I have right now. I was also thinking maybe a 5. Wheelbarrow race would be good. Now should we do the human wheelbarrow, where one man crawls across the ground and the other has his legs, or get real wheelbarrows and watch them tip?
I think maybe 8-10 events would be good. I'm trying to have beer, or beer paraphernalia as a part of all events. Obviously all can't be events with mass consumption of beer or nobody could complete it and it wouldn't appeal to a wide audience. Events that involve other skills are definitely needed.
Anyone who reads this is encouraged to contribute any ideas on possible events, or variations of current events. Maybe it will even get you a t-shirt! Possibly not.
Ok, so it may end up not being exactly as advertised above. But it should be a fuckin' good row. The plan is in it's infantile stages at the moment. I've come up with 4 solid events. And am working relentlessly on the rest. Flyers, food, maybe t-shirts and a trophy, it'll be sweet. And if nobody shows up, well Pat and I will just get wasted and fight. It's a win win.
I wouldn't mind some help coming up with ideas. Here are the events thus far:
1. 40oz Dash (Race to drink 400z bottle of beer the fastest. Regular beer, not malt liquor)
2. Keg Toss (Empty keg, toss as far as you can, disqualified if you step over line. Done this one before, surprisingly awkward.)
3. Keg Stand (self-explanatory, longest keg stand wins)
4. Beirut (More skill in this event than drinking. Not sure if I want to do doubles or not. I'll have to type up a quick summary of the game for participants and spectators alike)
Those are the events I have right now. I was also thinking maybe a 5. Wheelbarrow race would be good. Now should we do the human wheelbarrow, where one man crawls across the ground and the other has his legs, or get real wheelbarrows and watch them tip?
I think maybe 8-10 events would be good. I'm trying to have beer, or beer paraphernalia as a part of all events. Obviously all can't be events with mass consumption of beer or nobody could complete it and it wouldn't appeal to a wide audience. Events that involve other skills are definitely needed.
Anyone who reads this is encouraged to contribute any ideas on possible events, or variations of current events. Maybe it will even get you a t-shirt! Possibly not.
posted by Joe at 2:55 PM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home